Wagon Wannabee - "Chocks" Chockington

[SUBARMAN]

What do we do about "Chocks"?

He is willing to accept mere ground crew duties and I feel he would add a certain style to the Ground Support Tactical Mayhem Team. He accepts he cannot train to be a pilot while still being a "Saloonie".

Can we think of a role for him?

There is a current vacancy for a Junior Formation Manoeuvre Technician, working alongside Ken Cobalt (Senior FMT).

Here is a recent picture of "Chocks":


Typical SFMT outfit


SFMT in action


SFMT relaxing


General TMT outfit


Or perhaps a role with the "ladies" in Squadron Admin?

Ready, willing and able............ SIR!

I understand he's even been looking for authentic WWII Ground Crew garb too!

[SUBARMAN]

Spiffo Chocks!!!!

Love the motto by the way!!!!!!!!

Just need input from SIR, and your alternative career may be underway!!!!

I do hope he gets in. He sounds a proper upstanding chap!

What what!

[SUBARMAN]

Judging by the picture, he will be our youngest member, not a wise old sage like yourself, Mr Worzel Sir!

I do like to be likened to herbs actually.

In fairness I am more of a Lemon Thyme than Sage?

Good ground crew are hard to come by. The role would have to be taken with seriousness beyond belief! To enter into such ribaldry and jolly spiffing japery at such a young age could turn a young mans head all a tizzy if he were not careful!

Are you sure that young "Chocks" is of the mental capacity to handle such derring doo and spiffingness?

[buzz]

erm

had a talk on the radios about this mater the other night, the out come was!!!!!!!!!!

we cant realy say no as we might be classed as clicky,

so you can join but for the first week, you have to stand in the corner with a silly hat on during flight training, and when we are on opps.

the second week, you will sit on the norty step, when we atend our dutes.

the third week, you can polish all our silver wear

and the fourth week, you can repaint the lines on the runways and parking pays,

also

can you make a good cupa, but then after opps we need our wagon water to refresh us so scrap the cuppa

can "Chocks" Chockington survie the first set of tests!







just a laugh before someone takes the above seriously

I think Chock's is more than capable of such duties, he is a fine figure of a man

I am sure he will enjoy the norty step

[SUBARMAN]

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE NORTY STEP!!!!!

Even I don't know what that is all about, but as you say Martyn, he is well-versed in norty-ness, and I am sure he will have the mental aptitude to absorb whatever trial the "norty step" brings forth!!!!


Perhaps Worzel, who seems to know him well, can advise us

BRING ON THE NORTY STEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will speak with "Chocks" today and tell him that his application has been accepted and the expectations placed upon him.

I expect it may take an hour or so for him to calm down enough from his euphoric state of being after such splendiferous news, but I am sure he will be on today to leave a message.

Chocks is absolutely perfect for this wonderful and unique section, he has already trained in secret for this and has learned ping pong bat control to level 4, taken evening classes at tea making in the Officers mess which includes special blend infusions and correct biscuit choices. He has also been practicing the "Evo Salute" upon spotting this deadly enemy.

[majorscooby]

Could someone enlighten me please on how to perform this so called evo salute! pics would be good

[SUBARMAN]

A picture of a Mitsubishi warrior, after being caught at the perimeter fence trying to get onto the secret Squadron base. One of the security guys roughed him up a little bit on the way back to the Squadron Guard House! After interrogation, he revealed "secret plans" relating to the "stealth garble unit" being fitted to the Evo IX.


Here also is a picture of Senior Formation Manoeuvre Technician Ken "The Pouch" Cobalt undergoing pilot training (he failed)!!!

[2-jaffacake-tone]

the last pic is a bit worrying seeing keith went there on his own

[SUBARMAN]

Originally Posted by 2-jaffacake-tone

the last pic is a bit worrying seeing keith went there on his own

I am not allowed out on my own !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Granby]

Originally Posted by SUBARMAN

I am not allowed out on my own !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can't understand why

I've only just stopped shaking enough to type this reply. When "Worzel" told me the news I almost flibbered my gibbert!

As mentioned by "Worzel" I have been on the look out for "Uniform". Is there a standard issue version that you could point me in the right direction of? Or shall I ..... "Surprise" you?

I am looking forward to becoming a part of this legendary squadron (all be it from the slight outside ranks) and will do all I can to fulfil all of my pilot officers needs. I will undertake my duties with much gusto, vim and vigour. And I will only yell "Hurrah" when requested.

Could you please inform me of my fellow ground crew members, so that I can maybe liaise with them at some point?

Yours excitedly

Chocks






HURRAH AND HUSSAH, BING BANGEROONY, CHIP CHIP CHERIO!!! WHAT WHAT!!

[SUBARMAN]

Well you have met Ken "The Pouch" Cobalt in various guises, but as our Senior Formation Manoeuvre Technician he has control of all kites when they are on the ground. He has a range of outfits, similar to those of Dan the Man, another "groundie" who has responsibility primarily for the Squadron flag.

Ken with his paddles (Source: Squadron Press Office)


Ken relaxing with his favourite read - Practical Poultry


Ken in action, letting red flight off on patrol


Dan the Man (Source: Squadron Press Office)


Dan the Man at about 100 mph, braving the elements


Members of the Tactical Mayhem Team (Chocks will be posted under their wing)
(They look like some of the pilots, but this is for security purposes only)


The Wagons are cleaned by female cleaning staff - each pilot specifies the uniform of his personal Wagon Cleaner, but all the uniforms must be flimsy!


This cleaner has her lower garment made of special cleaning material so she just rubs along the bodywork, like this! Swirls are a thing of the past with this method!


As you will see, the ground staff, apart from the cleaners, tend to wear a blue or black base to their "kit". The pilots wear black, and if you were to be in the Sector Black Stealth Flight (VERY UNLIKELY), you would get a big gun (for hazardous missions) and your uniform would be a tight-fitting pressure suit to deal with G forces and the like!



Hope that helps!

Thank you SIR!

This has helped me no end. I will base my uniform on the very clothing that Ken "The pouch" Cobalt is wearing in the top 3 pictures. And will wear it with pride

I take that the "Tactical Mayhem Team" will be giving me the training required to meet your extremely high standards? I feel it neccessary to receive the right training from the correct lunatics to fully understand my role within this hallowed squadron.

I am looking forward to my chance to prove my worth to you and your erstwhile collegues for many years to come.

Chocks

PS

Can't wait to use those "cleaning products" that are pictured above.

ooh ahhh ive gone all parculiar matron. Fetch the spittoon

[majorscooby]

WOWZERS MY WAGON NEEDS CLEANING

[SUBARMAN]

Come on Chocks!!! The Major's Wagon needs a clean - better get over there sharpish......what what!!!!